WeI ShEn Zi?!

2006-11-12T04:33:00.000-08:00

I meet a long lost primary school friend of mine during my course. But he is married with a nine month old children. During my bus trip home from base, we chat about his baby. From what he describe, the baby must be very cute.

From I chat, I realised he is mature in thinking. It is really impressed to see that such a young age he actually has soild plan for the future. I can see he must have gone through quite alot.

There has been one saying in chinese that a boy will only become a man if he got married. I find it quite true. Army supposed to turn a boy into a man (claimed by the advertisement) However some of them, from what I have seen, never grow up. (wonder if army has failed them or they have failed the army).

So what's the morale of the story?

If you want to become a man, get married with children or join the army?

It depend on yourself.

some thoughts only..

Blisters..

2006-10-01T02:05:00.000-07:00

Had some blisters after the Route march. The size is big. I poke it to release the water inside and cut away the skin. It's damm bloody painfully when I applied the green prawn herbal oil (qing chao you). Some kind of high.It look like this after a few days later. Now, the skin peel off by itself.

Warning: Viewer Discreet is advised.

Right Leg - a total of 4 Blister for this one

Second Pic

Lef leg - A total of 4 Blisters as well

PS: Tighten your boots during route march!

In the army

2006-09-01T09:07:00.000-07:00

Have no been updating the blog for quite sometimes. It took me a while to recall the password. haha..

This few months have been spending at Tekong serving my NS. I'm gonna POP soon 2 wks later. Think will miss my BMT.

To those out there, I will try to update as much as I could.

Long TIme no blog liao!

2006-08-26T23:52:00.000-07:00

It's has been more than 5 months since I blogged.

Dunno why lei.. Anyway, I'm serving NS and gonna POP soon.

As for me now I'm thinner n pass my IPPT finally for the first time in my life! (something +ve NS has changed me)

Now I realised how fortunate studies can be compare to other thing else. Study has holiday. They no need to book in to camp, can watch movie anytime, eat anything they want... ....

haha...

Nevertheless, I think I'm gonna miss BMT.

Yeah..

Got time den update here.. haha..

Cheers!

POP LO!!!

Goodies Bag Packing

2006-03-21T21:52:00.000-08:00

Getting a goodies bag may seem easy. But when it come to packing. it is a logistic nightmare! Trust me, next time u heard about goodies bag, it will freak you out.

Since a few years ago, my CCA have been welcoming our newly joined cadets from all around country to a ceremony inside Singapore Indoor Stadium. We will give them a Goodies Bag each. So each year there will be estimated 5 thousands bag to be given.

With such a huge quantity, so how are we going to pack?

Answer: Mobilize everyone you can find in the name list.

Volunteer hardworking at packing.

Shown here are only a small portions of what is suppose to pack.

The turnout is consider not bad. We managed to settle all 5 thousands goodies bag within one day. Our initial target is 3 days.

A good job well done!

While we were celebrating our achievement, the day started to rain.. and it get heavier. Pis* off with it. Then for a moment I thought, we have coconut tree and it's raining.. hmmm... we could run under the tree like Bollywood movie. haha..

Fortunately, there is plenty of flatten wooden boxes.

Scrolling under the rain

How sensational..

2006-03-11T04:14:00.000-08:00

Yesterday marks the final day of our poly life. Looking back, it has alot of sweet and sour memory. Just like remembering the first day of school is yesterday, we are not familiar with each other and everyone was just starting to know each other. Then every hour is like every semesters passed. With every semester gone, we learn and work with each other, helping those who are in need, playing punk together, fly each other plane together... Those were the times that left a deep impression in our heart. Now the only thing we could do is to keep memory together so that 10 years down the roads, we will still remember each other.

Now with the poly is over, one stage of my life is also over, how about the next one? Enlisting? Siging on? Further study? No matter what the case, I like to say Thank you guys for giving me such a wonderful experience in NYP. Anyway talk about the last day at FYP, I'm still rushing for new assigned task by my supervisor. Yup.. only like the last 5 minutes of the day that my supervisor confirmed that my project is finished. Phew.. Finally it's over. However, I skilfully took sometime off from my hectic project for a few camera shoot. (proj can nv be completely done but the day will definitely be over). While I was coding halfway, something happened. Jia xian has finally straightened her hair!! WAH!!

Sheng Chuan waving. Oh ya, Lecturer Fong remember our coat ar..

Left: jia Xian, Lim Hong, Me
Speak no evil, Hear no evil, See no evil.

Left: Lian Sheng, Hong again(act gangster), Me

Kiss?! My first Kiss? I must be dreaming..

Left: Wen Jun and Me!

Left: Desmond, Me, Fahmi
Excellent Buddies for gym workout

Left: Fren(Dunno the name), Michelle, Me

Left: Cihao and Zhi wei

Left: Daniel and Siyun

Left: Me and Xian Rong

Left: Me, Michelle, Jun(1) wei(1) aka Junz, sixth month

Left: The com which I'm using for FYP.

Remind me of the days at SSDC.
To Fel: I nv said it is ur helmet ar.. oh ya.. forget to take ur pic so no pic here.. peiseh ar..

Take Care Guys!

Keys!

2006-01-30T05:47:00.000-08:00

I have recently notice some of my keys are unless and have been carrying and putting weight on my pocket. (that will explain why my pant would drop)

Looking at the reduntant keys, some of which are useless even a few years ago. It is very bulky and uncomfortable especially when it is placed at the back of your buttock. Nonetheless, you feel like you have a "seh" around you, like the keys could open a safe full of goldbars in my house.

Key from the right:
1) Car Key (Corolla)
2) Small Lock key
3) Bicycle Chain Lock key
(Bicycle stolen ard 4 years ago. I think I should put this key to the crime sence so that thief could retrieve it?!)

Happy Chinese New Year

2006-01-28T06:42:00.000-08:00

Wish all of my friend a Happy Chines New Year! Wish those who want to tio TOTO win big big, those who want to get prettier more prettier, those who want to lose weight, quickly lose more weight the correct way.

Hmm.. when i think of this year new year, kind of strange cos I'll be going to graduate n serve NS this year. Which mean to say this is the last year I will be celebrating CNY as a civiliian. Next year will be a botak CNY for most of us. So must celebrate as much as we can now. Haha..

Gong Xi Fa Chai!

I have found you!

2006-01-17T08:02:00.000-08:00

It happened 20 years ago when my parent decided to bring in one family member. It was a Toyota Corolla. We enjoy the ride she gave us and where you want to go, she would take you there. having the breeze sweep through your face, you will feel nothing is better on earth. It defintely brought joy to us.

picture of her during the last remaining year..
Over the year, she has been in great service to us. She carried heavy loads of equipment, tow a pickup, transport 8 persons seomtime.. But the age catches up on her, she got sick more often until lately, we know it is time for her to take a rest (aka scrap). We bid good bye to her in year 2005. It was a heart breaking moment.

Recently, I deceided to do a search for her again. I have no idea where and how to look for her. So I posted on newspaper and conducted serveral search national wide. I track down the ~~muderer~~ agent who takes off the life support system (aka deregister).

With a little luck, I finally located her.

Though I could not recongise anymore, one look at her I immediately know it is her.
I have finally found you..

This is the picture of her..

haha.. Got you didn't it?

I knew it's cold. Wear more clothes and don't get cold hor.. haha..

2006-01-16T07:23:00.000-08:00

I'm am having my FYP this period and the project that required me to use PDA phone. Wah Pian, first time touching this thing before. It's huge but quite slow. From the model, it's only available recently late last year so it's quite pretty new.

My supervisor loan it to me(Muhaha..) I ~~Can show off around~~ can design my project with a real physical device. It will improve the ~~relationship between the school and student~~ reality of developing project for company. However, when you walk around with this, you will feel "wanted" by robber. Hair drop can grow back, PDA drop your ball also has to drop. Gonna protect it with all my life sia

A picture of IPAQ
(this is dedicated to xb who is in Blk R. Envy this pic? haha)

HAPPY NEW YEAR 2006

2005-12-31T09:44:00.000-08:00

With Fireworks being sparkled around the sky, it mark the end of Year 2005. It has been an eventful year in 2005. Much thing has happened and some left us with memories that will never fade away. But no matter what, we have to carry on with our life. With a New year coming there will be new hope. Wish everybody will be get their wish comes true and good health to everyone!

It has been 2 years since our last meeting. How time flies. I have learn alot during this 2 years, learning new thing everyday. Even though it may seem to be an end, I still feel that there is a something which is yet to be clarify. Till get this thing striaght, I will keep spinning around in the cycle, keep wondering thinking it will be true. Certain memory can't be erase. It feel like it happen just happen yesterday. Nevertheless, you know it will not repeat again. Sometime it feel like foolish thing to do but yet you still do it. I don't know why. You have gone so far away and I am still at the starting point in doubt. No matter what, take care of yourself and Best Wishes.

2005-12-26T03:54:00.000-08:00

Haiz.. Chirstmas come so fast and gone so fast.. Today is the last day of the holiday.(What I want most!!) This year chirstmas is a great havest. I've received a tissue holder(exchange gift, got from Fel's bf terence, placed in my father parent car liao), toiletry set from my ex tution teacher(first time seeing this thing) and a card from Fenni(peiseh could not send card in time)

Spent yesterday celebrating with my cousins and nephews. Have a fun time playing with them, talking cock with them. The best part is the food! Unfortunately, I've caught a Fever and sorethroat which made have to adsent from alot of gurmet(@#$%&*)

Suppose to be in Sentosa today, haiz.. too bad I've not recover from my illness and could not be with my NCC friends. The worst part is I've gotten the present(you look at my size you should know what I've bought, Expensive one lei..) but then Look like I've to eat myself.

Tommorrow will be going back for FYPJ. Only the FYPJ guys will be in school cos all other student will be having their Break. Why not us??(Gerkk..) So I will be lonely, Mr Lonely..
Anyway better to go back school, doing nothing at home also.

2005-12-23T00:30:00.000-08:00

Five days have pass since I went back for FYPJ. I met alot of people from tall guy[zhiwei] to even taller guy[mingwie n lim hong](Twin tower) to round guy[me] to even more rounder[cihao] to a.. erm.. flat? [jx](To protect her identify)...

Finally met all people who I've not seen for 3 months. Shawn coloured his hair, mingwie grow his hair, Hong zhng his hair, I removed my armpit hair(joking la.. ya.. very cold)

First week nothing to do, can walk here walk there do nothing. Also there is no mood to do as Chirstmas is near. Also just got a lecture by my sup for not going to sch as I've not feeling well. haiz.. so suay.. Just hope that next wk will be better..

Oh ya.. I've played O2 Jam recently till I got dizzy.. blur blur.. However, I am able to dress up my character. He will not be naked anymore. Muhaha..

The Hangman

2005-12-01T00:36:00.000-08:00

Hang·man
1. A man employed to execute condemned prisoners by hanging
2.A game in which one player chooses a word whose letters are guessed at by another player. For each wrong guess, a new part of the stick figure of a hanging man is drawn.
(extracted from dictionary.com)

Recent unfortunate event has made me research about this. Have you ever wonder who would do the job of hanging another person in Singapore all these years? If you watch drama or Movie, it isn't hard to piece together the imagine of hangman. Wearing a black mask with two holes for the eye. Then he would measure the size of the condemned man neck, put the rope around the neck. Eventually, when the time arrived, he would pull the lever. Cliccckkk... then you know what happen.

The face of hangman is finally releaved. He is 74 years old Indian man and lives in western part of Singapore. From the news report, our hangman received $400 for every hang. He also mentioned he has hanged over 800 peoples which mean to say he would received $320 000(don't know before tax or after tax) if the rate remain constant. . I think his occuption has been ~~hanging people~~ upholding justice. (wonder how his resume would look like)

Well, this thing has to be done by someone. If not Singapore would not what it is now. Oh ya, I can tell you this is one job which I would not apply.

To take a look at our handman, Click here

dumblaws

2005-11-29T18:44:00.001-08:00

Today I went online and surf net and came across a interesting website. It's quite fun to know that there are such laws exsist around the world. Wahaha.. So next time if you plan to travel, make sure you read up such site first..

Oh ya, they are under one network called dumb. It has other category such as Dumb Auctions, Dumb Bumpers, Dumb Criminals, Dumb Facts.. Got lots more.. I've a big laugh.. Wahaha..

For Dumbo, click here:
http://www.dumblaws.com/

For Normal people, click here:
http://www.dumblaws.com/

(Note: if you think there is different between these two, then you are dumb.. ) {Joking.. }

(Dedicated to the dumbos in my office.. enjoy reading.. cheers)

2005-11-28T19:26:00.000-08:00

huh..rental rebates for 700,000 households and HDB upgrading programme..

hmmm.. one thing is certain..

ELECTION maybe coming...

LOL..

(Haha.. personal view ar..)

Exploration II

2005-11-22T17:10:00.000-08:00

Another exploration again. This time it's at Sebawang park. If you have been to the park, you will only see a small sketch of beach sometime filled with oil.(think from the nearby ship) But not many people know there is one bigger sandy beach on the another side of the park. So I decided to do a exploration over there.

See the jetty? It's located beside Bottle Tree Village and Wak Hassan. There's a sketch of beach which only appears during low tide. That mean you can only walk from one side of the beach to the another only when in low tide. Lucky I went on the correct time.

You can take your gf and scroll along the beach. Make sure it's low tide or else prepare your swimming gear. Also one point to note, there maybe some uncles fishing down there so if you want to kiss or do other thing, do lookout for them, you don't want the atmosphere to be spoil rite? haha.. lolx..

Wall at the seafront. No idea why was it built.. for WW2 or Kampong village?

This is the side of the wall.

Huge sandy coasty beachy beach..

At the top of the beach, you can BBQ or tent over there.

Waterfall?! No la.. just a close up shot of the water flowing from long kang.

Nice Background for my 2x2(bike) ar..

My bicycle in the middle of the beach.
(Note: To take this pic, you must find something hard for the bicycle's stand. The sand is soft and cannot support your stand)

Another shot..

One more shot of my bike.. nice angle right?

Finally shot of my bike's wheel..

If you are interested, you can go to the following wesite which I happened to find in the net after the exploration. They have a rich content of history that you may find it useful.

http://habitatnews.nus.edu.sg/heritage/sembawang/index.html

Overweight?!

2005-11-20T22:19:00.000-08:00

I've calculated my BMI recently. I'm 80.4 Kg now(Wah pian...!) and in order to reach acceptable weight, I must lose 10.9kg to 69.5Kg.. @#$%&.. or else, I will not be able to upgrade my Pes to B. As of now, I will need to enlist a few weeks earlier... :(

How can right.. I've been trying for years but weight still increase. Then in 7 months must lose 10Kg b4 I enlist. Aiyo.. anyway nothing is impossible.. Muhaha.. you never know when the next time u meet me, you will not recongise me. Hehe.. ok la.. enough of talking shit.. better go back to excerise more.. haha..

Food Review

2005-11-19T20:13:00.000-08:00

A few weeks ago, I went to Sims Ave with my parent to eat some tradition Hakka Food. It is own by one old uncle and aunty and is located at the side of the coffee stall. The stall name is Hakka Lei Cha Fan (客家擂茶饭).

Sound Chim.. what is that dish? When I tell you what the ingredients, you will be surprised. The most important ingredient is vegetables and more vegetable. It has bean and some other vegetables that I have not seen before. It is considered a vegetarian food if you take away the ikan bekli. The uncle will put the chop vegetables on top of the bowl of rice. So the top of will be filled with different kinds of vegetables. Then you have to mix around with the rice before you start eating. The taste is vegetable. Ok.. at least it’s a combined taste of different vegetable. Quite yummy! The ikan bekli and fried peanuts added crunch to it. It is a healthy food.

What makes this food special I think is its soup. It taste somehow a bit sour and the overwhelming smell will freak you out. From what I understand, the soup is made of some kind of vegetable. The uncle will pour one third of soup into the bowl and dilute with hot water. Imagine how thick the soup is. You need some practice to complete the soup. It is just like smelly bean curd, if you think it’s nice then you are prepared for this it.

Overall, it is a delicious and nutritious food. You should try it someday when you are free. In fact, it is listed in Singapore’s 50 Disappearing Food. They have a website. www.sbestfood.com/jiaxiang.htm

Hope you enjoy!

2005-11-18T20:57:00.000-08:00

Today I shall post about my family car. A nice 20 years old Toyota Corolla with a 1.3L engine. This vehicle is older than I am! Despite its age, it can accelerate faster than most auto car found on the street now, beside the fact that auto vehicle accelerates slower. The steering wheel is very stiff and hard to turn. The gearbox is also hard to push as well. The air con if you switch on and off is the same. Other that all these, it is a good nice vehicle to drive.

Very soon we have to say Good Bye to this vehicle forever. The reason is the COE is going to expiry end of this year which mean only left 41 days on the road. After which, it will be send for scrap yard. Sob sob.. After all, this vehicle grow old with me. I want the car plate.. place in front of my bicycle? haha.. maybe..

Look.. i'm still able to do vertical parking after more than half a year.

Front View

Counting down to 31 Dec.. last day of daylight.. then scrap metal..

2005-11-17T22:33:00.000-08:00

My Family has one characteristic which is BIG. Everything must be BIG, HUGE, GAGENTIC! Yup.. you will not believe till you see it yourself. Let me take a few example, the newly installed telephone. What’s so special about that? It’s not cordless nor any video conference phone. So what’s so BIG about this phone? The answer is its button. You can take a look at the picture below and you will understand. If you cannot see the picture clearly, at the top left hand side is 20 cent coin. The button is 2 times bigger than the coin! Guarantee from far you can see the button; it just can’t get any more bigger right. Haha..

Singapore's population is ageing. I think this type of phone should be common in the near future. I guess my family has started preparing for it. :)

Another example..

Do you ever see people buying 20 century eggs at one go? Normally we only bought the most 6 in a packet at supermarket. I have no idea where my father got this lobang. But after he bought the century egg, I think I fall in love with in them. Combine them with sliced ginger, you will get yourself a splendid, yummy taste of food. Well, it's true so much so that I even bought the porridge with century egg at Yishun Central. Yum Yum.. You should try it sometime..

Not to mention that we used to buy 50kg of rice sometimes. Imagine that only 5 of us, we can comsume 50Kg of rice in... 3 months? Then another 50kg pack. Now you see how I got my size. Oh ya.. my flat do not have lift. The worst part is we stay on top level. Ya..

2005-11-16T01:32:00.000-08:00

Today happened 2 things. First Xb, June and Mich was talking about xiaxue's trip in Thailand. They were talking about some Thailand Show. I heard "Tiger Show".

Xb: .. above 21 years old then can enter...

Me:(thinking) huh.. need 21 years old then can enter? Is it they afraid that the Tiger goes crazy then attack the trainer? Set the age limit so that the kid would not be able to watch the horror scence if it occur.

I thought at that time it sound logic. Then as June they all carry on the conversation, I found it more and more unrelated. Finally, I surf XiaXue's blog. I realised I've commited a "Da Wu Long". It's not called "Tiger Show" but is "Thai Girl Show".

WT.. -_-"

Aiyo.. no wonder age limit is 21 years old!

Later that day, outside the office was pouring rain like no other people business. I was late for off work and Mich they all waits for me. When we reach the meeting point, we saw our company bus went off. If we decided to walk instead, we will be "lou tang chi".

So we decidecd to hail a cab. THe driver did not place "Hired" and we all just happyily enter the cab. Then the uncle ask "are you ms .."

We: huh.. ?

Taxi: Anyone of you called ms ..

(We boarded the wrong cab. The most embrassing part is beside the taxi are plenty of staffs around. We can't feel there is a hole beside and dug into it. How embrassing.. haha.. All because of my fault.. lol.. )

We: ... @$%&*...

So I decided to buy a potato chip for them the next day. However, before they have a chance to eat, I've eaten half. Xb and June consumed the rest. Mich is left with nothing.. will she notice the chip is gone? I think after reading this blog she will realise.. haha..

Exploration

2005-10-30T13:35:00.000-08:00

Today I do some exploration on my own at Yishun. I have been living here since I was born. But there some places which I have never step into before. So I decided to explore these places on my new bike. Hah.. called myself a kampong boy.

1st Places: The entry oppsite Blk 810. Below is a map of Blk 810 by Can.com.sg

For years I kept wondering where does this road goes to? Why must it have a gate installed? All these curiousness make me want to go and take a look. Maybe I will make some discovery over there, like what CNA Asia's Best Kept Secrets does. Unforuntately, the gate is locked when I reached there. What a luck!

Locked!

Opening hours..

Oh ya.. my new bicycle. Nice looking ar.. :)

Unable to get into the area, I toured around the park and found a very important person. He is LimNee Soon. Sound familiar? After I read the article about him, I know he had contributed much to Singapore in the early days. No wonder he has a few town named after him. Also if you lives in Yishun, you should have heard of chong pang. Yup, chong pang is another person. He is the son of Nee Soon.

Statue of Lim Nee Soon

After visiting the park, I decided to visit another park, Lower Seletar park. It is situated next to Lendor Ave. It has a jetty which you can used to fish. Who know you can fished something nice in reservoir over there.

Fishing Jetty. A nice and cosy place for couple to pai tau at night. Wee u Wee..

Bridge?! No problem! Advance and Overcome!

Seletar Satellite Station(Classifield?)

Soon, I press on to next destination. Along the Lentor Ave, there will be one left turn into some area. Hardly you can see people or car travelling there. So I decided to check it out.

This is the left turn. It say you must be less than 3.6m to go through. I guess I fit that condition.
Nice shot too. Background is a passby train.

Halt! Advance to be recongise..

Peaceful and quiet road stretches to.. er.. a far far away places..

Another train passby..

Got a tiny cut by the protruding branch while riding.

Well found out the road led to Seletar Satellite Station(pic as above) Then I ride to my attachment company. The pavement along Lentor Ave is narrow and uneven. The worst is some part of the pavement do not have barrier at the side of the road which mean you have no protection if vehicial is coming towards you. Despite that, you can reach the company safely if you ride carefully in around 40mintues. Imagine the amount of money saved during the whole attachment! But if I would be doing that, I will breath in alot of polluated air during the journy. Futhurmore I don't think my company got place to park my bicycle. They charged fee for parking. Have to think weight the pro and con.

Overall, I enjoy the trip today. When you have plenty of time to spend can consider trying this. Planning and access the "unexplored" area is quite an unique experience. Yeah! :)

2nd Post - Mad!!

2005-10-30T06:48:00.000-08:00

I drove today and stopped at the red light. I want to turn left but there was pedestrain crossing the road so I slowly move off my car. Suddenly the car behind horn and high beam. At that time I really cured and swear at the guy. I pointed my finger out of the window but was hinder by the window. I was really MAD and scolding all the vulgarity I know of. Never was I so mad before. (cb... What you expect me to do? Ran over the predestrain? or moved close the line? How you pass your TP?.. cb.. knn.. f*** driver of SDP788[something]..) If I see you I don't know what I will be doing next. Even after half an hour I still feel angry.

During that period, my mother keep calming me down. She kept saying I don't have tolerance. After I claim down, I realise how close I am in getting trouble. Also I found out more about myself. When I go mad, I lost human sense; I can't control myself. I should get a hold of myself. I guess my mother is correct, I have a weakness to overcome.

Should I thank that driver or should I curse that driver?

2005-10-29T20:56:00.000-07:00

Today I cooked carrot cake for my family. The carrrot cake is prepared by my mother the previous night. She knows how to cook alot of dishes.(now you know how I got this size.. haha..) I prepared garlie, oinion springe...

I prepare dishes for my brother and sister first. I added a few prawns. After she nearly complete her dishes, she walked up to me, bang her plate onto the table then scold.

sis: "You dunno I cannot eat prawn meh. you are so selfish, always think of yourself... Now, I felt itch all over already la..."
(while taking away my carrot cake I've prepared for myself. I wanna slim down so I did not add prawn. I do not know she dislikes prawn. )

sis:"You better finish that!" (pointing to her plate of carrot cake with prawn)

She is making a fuss out of it, walking out of the kitchen. A few moment later, she returned.

Sis: "You dunno I cannot eat prawn meh..?!"

From what I can recalled, you ate most of the crab last time. Ya, it's my fault that I don't know what you cannot eat.(not to mention you never request me not to add prawn) It's my fault to prepare the ingrediants while you are reading newspaper, waiting for your bf sms. I'm selfish that I cooked your meal before mine. I'm sorry we cannot serve you what you want us to serve you. We are always at fault. If anything you don't like, please shout n scold at us within four walls. Don't scream near the window and said thing we are afraid to hear like "zhong nan qing nu", all the good thing goes to the male(my brother and I). We get alot of things for we shared a room smaller than your one, you got 2 fans while we shared one, you got a new piano, you got a new computer when you enter poly, my one is bought by my own money. Yes, the male get alot of thing, you are the least privilges one.

I've done what I can. I have enough! I am not born to be a servant. It's time I find me myself back. When people said how they don't have this, don't have that, always treat other people good, I get frighten. Oh ya, before you want to shout and scream again, ask what you have done first.

Hope you will get enlighten someday!
Good Luck! We will never give up on you!

2005-10-28T08:52:00.000-07:00

Wah.. I watched front line today. The physicist said something about "jin shen fen lei zhen" The symptom he described suit me. I'm gonna find a way to release my stress or else I may get that illness. Release stress.. Release stress... Wah.. Look like I'm gonna see a doctor soon. haha.. :P

2005-10-22T05:21:00.000-07:00

Today I washed HDB flats. Ya.. it is those HDB unit which have not been sold and left untouch for years. I got this lobang from my uncle. Together with my cousin and their friend, we went for this work.

I never know what is called dirty or filthy till I stepped into the unit. Oh my god.. No wonder they need people to clean. The dust is what I called layers of layers. One sweep on the ground u can see the thick layers of dust. You will know that the floor is white and not the grey that you see. If you lay on the floor and wipe ur arm and leg, you will find an Angel imprint on the floor like what the people did in winter(Do or dare.. go try it.. )

I have taken a few shots in the flat.

This is one of the many cockroaches being swept down the bin by me
Got live and not so live one.

Guess what is it? Bird Nest! Not the one you eat.
Imagine the house is left for how long never use, so much so that the bird has time to build a big nest and hatched the egg. I hope can find egg(golden one better) then can be my tommorrow breakfast(Joking la.. ya very cold..) But never find any, only nest.
It takes me years to clear it.
... *yawn ...

This is one of the feather laying beside the nest. Evidence that it is a bird nest.
Wonder if the feather can be used as a writing instrument like the movie or not.

See the layers and layers of dust?!
Ya.. this pic show my shoes print. (den can dig out and sell online like what the star do.. haha..) ya.. i know super cold liao..

Another pic to show the amount of dust deposit there.

Overall, it's very tedious and hectic to clean every inches of the floor. But after you clean the room, you will feel a sense of fulfillment. Imagine that unit is only for a few years so dirty, my room is even more longer also not as dirty as this. I realise how hard my mother put in effort everyday to clean and wash. hehe.. Now if I see anything which have abit of dust, I feel like cleaning and wiping it till sparkling clean. Abit overboard..?

I have found you? WHERE AER YOU?! Hard to find?!

2005-10-15T06:43:00.000-07:00

saw june's blog den suddendly sparked me to blog the trip in India. Got something intersting to share that cannot be find in singapore. still remember last Nov we take night flight to India. We have to start our journy in the middle of the night. zzZZ...

The horn of the buses is made of airhorn, those kind in the ship but smaller in size. My hotel is just beside the road. The buses just keep horning for don't know what reason. Even motor and car horn even though in the middle of night! Can't get a good sleep then. When I felt like sleeping, the sun rises. Arghh..

First sight that we step out of hotel.
A man climbing up on top of a mountain of dry grass(shd be)

Another pics.. this is the time we look forward the most..

This is where we bath throughout our stay beside the road. hehe.. (jialat.. half naked..) :P
The pump is shared by the villagers.

Guess what is it?
Answer is... a river of shit wasted down from toilet and accumlated there.

Overall the experience is uqiene. We took bull log to our worksite. Take tractor back. I don't think Singapore can find this. haha..

2005-10-14T08:18:00.000-07:00

Well, this is a request by michelle. Quite hard to answer.. *snatch head

Seven things that will scare me:
1. Illness
2. Height
3. Famine ( judge frm my size u shd know.. lol)
4. Lonely and lost
5. Losing my loved ones
6. Cockroaches?! (haha..)
7. Figure on the weighting machine

Seven things I like the most:
1. Happiness
2. World Peace
3. No starvation n disease
4. Good Health
5. Gold bar?!
6. Trying thing which I have not done before
7. Relaxed and Easy

Seven most important things in my room:
1. Pillow, blanket, bed..
2. Computer
3. Fan
4. Clothes
5. Tables
6. Lights
7. Books

Seven random facts about me:
1. Kaisu and kaisee person
2. Frog in the well
3. Cannot handle stress well
4. I like garfield and doramon
5. I sweat like running tap and still sweat
6. Like Politics
7. Get distracted easily

Seven things I can do:
1. Live without handphone and internet
2. Eat more than the rest?!
3. Play games all day
4. Do thing which other people normally don't do
5. Sleep longer
6. Talk cock sing song
7. Programming?!

Seven things I can't do:
1. Fasting! (will go crazy if I do)
2. Read story books
3. Go orchard road all day long
4. Get stress
5. Cannot tell lies
6. Stay up late
7. Sing (monotone)

Seven things I say the most:
1. kai wan siao (joking)
2. ya..
3. like that ar..
4. er..
5. wah sianz
6. funny sia
7. you are pro

Seven celeb crushes:
1. Kitaro (dunno whether this count anot)
2. J lopez
3. Jolin Tsai
4. Eva Longoria
5. Xin Yue Tuan
6. Micheal Jackson
7. F.I.R

Seven people I would love to do this: (taken from yisan.. lazy to do)
1. Any
2. 1
3. who
4. c
5. dis
6. can
7. do.

2005-10-13T08:30:00.000-07:00

Yesterday i saw an accident at yishun ring road while walking back to school. Two taxi kisses (collided with) each other. An ambulance was at the scene when I’ve arrived. This time fortunately, I don't think anyone is seriously injured.

This is the second time this road had accident for 2 consecutive weeks. First accident, one old lady was knocked down by a taxi. That time I noticed a crowd of people gathering beside the road. I know something was wrong then I realized that someone was hit.

What came to my mind is if next time there is a situation like this, am I able to provide first aid or be too shocked to do anything. If I were shocked, what good is I attended the standard first aid? If I were to attend to the victim, will I relieve her pain or will I cause more injuries. Mixed feeling ba... hard to say. Must wait till the situation happen then you will know.

Anyway we had a discussion regarding first aid today at my workplace. It’s interesting to heard June’s experience on her CCA. Mich and XB also talk about their band. Haha… during the conversation I suddenly have some ideas on how to make thing interesting for my cadets.. hahaha.. hehehe… but hor.. hahaha.. ohohoh.. anyway, that’s out of the topic.. keke..

2005-10-13T08:24:00.000-07:00

I've left some post @ my workplace. The internet is very slow and thus I type on notepad then transfer over. I'll get it transfer tmr.

zzZZ..

2005-10-10T01:13:00.000-07:00

I called up this friend last fri.

Me: How's your at..(interrupt)

ZW: You know ar.. my friend ask me to ferry them go Geylang ar. Then they ask me to choose one girl ar. He told me he likes this girl ver much but this is the first time i go so they let me choose her lei. But hor I don't want lei. They keep asking me to take this girl but hor i don't lei.. .. .. Now ar, I reget lei.. ... ... think of it now I reget lei.. ... ..

ME: hmm?! orh..

ZW: now ar i wait in the car for them lei.. feel reget lei but when I made up my mind I won't change de lei.. ... ...

Fifteen minutes has pass..

ZW: .. $40 half an hour. We go into the house one lei. Then they will put condom for u one.. .. ..

Me: wow.. orh.. continue..

The whole conversation I only know one thing. He regets it. haha.. He keeps telling me he regets it. I suan him by telling him reget ar. He tell me the girls from these country la nice one, nature one then another country fake fake one.. He seems experience. haha.. Ok la, he's just influnce by his friend la. He's not that bad after all.. sometimes maybe.. Anyway he talk n talk until his friend return. then he wants to cut the phone. haha.. what to do..

Note: conversation has been edited so as not to make it xxx. :)

2005-10-09T02:26:00.000-07:00

Finally got a new bike. Not motor one but bicycle. I bought for 210 bucks, bargain down from 228. That shop owner seem quite piss off.. hehe.. peiseh ar.. I test ride the bicycle to lower seletar deep deep inside where old uncles sit there and fish. It's located beside the seletar airport.

You can see abit of runway and jet station at the runway. Very nice view.. If you wanna go there prepare to get a vehical; it's a bumpy ride to get there. My body and butt get so aches. erkk...

Result will out in Tueday morning. Pray hard hard that our result will be ok. Last chance to push GPA up to 3 liao. hehe.. pray hard hard.. :)

2005-10-06T02:05:00.000-07:00

4 days has pass liao
We have been assigned.. stored.. procedure.. STORE PROCEDURE...
ok la.. we got learned in poly but hor here very different. This is the first time I know stored procedure can have 5 or more SELECT statements in one SELECT, outer or inner join..Wo de ma ar.. -_-"" Normally in sch got 2 select statements consider very difficult liao.. now got so much.. haiz.. This one stored procedure we have been doing for i think going to be 3 days. Somemore computer so slow even worst.. haiz haiz..
My desk is more like my pig sty. I put whatever thing I can find from my home and bring to my desk. It's getting mroe and more packed as the day pass.. Muhaha.. Sit beside me is xuebin(giggle queen named by june)Sit infront of me is june and michelle(daiqui Queen)(whatever the spellig)
I found I'm getting more rounder le. So jialat.. Whole day eat, sit n eat again. No wonder that putting on weight. Must think of something or else die.
Attachment is so sian. When u started work, u look forward to lunch. After lunch you look forward to go home. Go back makan n sleep. Next day do the same thing again. Haiz.. U look forward to weekend. Then monday get monday blue.. haiz..

Still very alive.. much..

2005-10-04T08:43:00.000-07:00

wah.. second day for IPP..

So sian.. do nothing.. maybe beause we've just getting started..

The working enviroment is very comfortable, very cold.. very conducive.. We're located in one room all by ourselves(hurrrreeyy.. alot of privary!) Still can remember how much "house cleaning" we have done yesterday. We stepped into the room. wow.. so messy, dust everywhere, litter everywhere, spiderweb too(joking la.. ya.. very cold..) Then all of us "transformed" the whole room into what we call "our" room. Haha.. should have taken a before and after photo.

Today all of us brought something to office especially xuebin and I. Tell you what we bring, 2 rabbit dolls, 1 pig doll, 1 dunno what is it called but placed on top of my monitor, mugs, container fills with biscuits and coffee, fruitella sweets, coffee and cerel drinks.. This is day 2 only hor.. Michelle suggest bringing plants.. huh.. ok.. let me search first.. fake one or real one also can hor.. (lu bian de hua er, ni bu yao cai.. ya.. very cold again)Our office's view is nice, but face to the west so whenever the sun set, there will be reflection from our monitor.

Talk about the PC, vomit blood. U know the first day, we shift and transfer PC all around. I settled down with one PC. ok.. it's slow.. Internet also slow.. everything also slow.. except for tea break and lunch. I try another also very slow. Guess what, first PC is 500Mhz, second one is 733Mhz.. Wow.. all do not exceed 1Ghz. Then june and michelle's com is 2.87Ghz(ard there). Sob Sob.. But u know gentlemen have to let ladies first.. haha..

I can open the window. If at anytime, I'm frustrated in programming and computer hang ar, I can throw the PC down anytime(violent..!) Haha.. anyway have to deal with it. Really admire the previous batch of student working in these PC.

ok la.. go sleep and I've to wake up early tmr. zzZZ..

2005-09-28T09:01:00.000-07:00

Second post for Today. Morning go IPP briefing by Ms chang. Den hor so terrible.. she brief us until like so jialat like tat.. cannot do this, cannot do that or else send back. Now I've a fear liao. I dunno muchabout Java, JSP, tomcat. Last time I touch this is year 1. Have to recall liao.. I'm pro Microsoft one. Everything use Microsoft one, office la, OS la, programming language la, database la, wireless mouse la, cat la.. everything..

We've been warned of danger of blogging for IPP. Cannot say much online, cannot say company name..

If i manage to survive first wave, second wave... eventually the whole IPP, I want a badge to be sow on my uniform, like airbone badge. Survivor of the fittest. Motto: Never say Die, novice today, professional tommorrow. Reason? can't review much.. I dun wan to be "return" even b4 the IPP start. hehe.. If I manage survive and I say if, I will be Incredible .

Ya.. lame post.. very cold.. wear sweather..

ok.. go sleep..

I willa survive..

To be a better man..

2005-09-28T07:11:00.000-07:00

Today I finally know more about this person. When I first met him, he seem like a cool guy to me, seldom talk, very cool.. At first I thought he is hard to get along with den as the days goes by, u get to know more about this cool guy. At first think he is terminator VI, like machine control, no feeling like that(joking ar..)

Just recently, I found him to be a sentimental person, after talking to him in the library last time, after reading his blog.. Suddendly this "terminator" changes to.. (er.. got any word to suggest anot? My eng not tat gd.. but u know the meaning la) to.. (whatever la.. know the word can msg me "-_-) Out of nowhere, I knew more and felt closer to this guy. (not gao gay ar..)

***

I think I can feel his pain, his augiush, his emotion.. You feel like shouting out to the whole world and nobody is listening to you. Life seem meaningless to you. All you want is to have that simple request and yet, you are rejected. How come this has to happen to you? Why can't we cannot be like others? What can I do to know you more? And no matter how hard you try, that person still leave you..

And you cry in middle of rain.. till you have shed every single drop of tear.. neglect every moment in your life.. the whole world seem to have collapsed on you. life is so tough to shallow... You wish life sould not be like this.. You don't want and you hope not..

She leaves you behind this lonely road.. walking forward without even looking back at you.. leaving you in this ditch(whatever).. You are left alone, nobody is beside you. You feel helpless. She has left out of sight and you reached this cross junction.

Suddenly, you realised you are a fool. Am I going to wake up or pretend this(she tell me she like me no more) doesn't happen. You stand in the middle of this cross junction. You lifted your head up, no one is aound. You are alone. Which way should I go? If I wake up, she will be gone. If I pretend this has not happen, she will be with me.. even though you know it is only a dream. So which one should I choose...? But no matter which way I choose, I want to let you know that you will always be in my heart. Never shall I leaves this world without any reget that I've made. No words seem too much for me on you. No matter where you go, I'll be always be here for you that we have spent such a wonderful and lovely time together. I always wish you the best.. always..

***
very touching is it hor.. also my english not that good.. Also, dun tell you who is the "nu zhu jiao"..

No fate with Cars

2005-09-23T22:59:00.000-07:00

haiz.. thing has been going not that smooth. You see, my father's car is nearly 20th years old(older than me) which mean, unless renew COE, will be scrap. P Plate still cannot take out car must scrap liao..

I've passed my lisence only late april this year. Ok, that's good. wah.. I thought I can go on the road. Very confident, very shiok.. but hor, when I take my first ride on my parent's car, somebody help me.. No power steering, no ABS, handbrake so stiff, brake need press deep deep, seat so cramp, so warm and stuffy, air con like no air con like tat.. It's a nightmare! I thought my instructor's car is average standard till you drive this one. Haha.. Heaven and Earth..

However hearding my bro's advice, I don't see that bad in driving this cos in NS, he drove even worst than this. (landrover, 3tonner..) Ok.. I managed to get more used to this vehical. Then came the news. COE gonna over soon..

At first my father said is Jan nxt year. I'm happy cos at least can drive for few more months. When I looked at COE receipt, it's Dec this year! wah?! So fast ar?!

I asked my parent whether they are going for a new car, I get a firm "Noooooooo....". They said that wanted me to take merc(buses) n bus 11(walk). "If you want a car then you have to work hard hard in the future!" Future? Let me calculate.. NS 2 years, dunno got go U but add 3 years in, work for dunno how many years to save money.. that mean a total of more than 5 years! I think I need not learn driving so soon cos by that time I've forgotten how to drive liao.

Think of the bright side, can transfer my P-Plate to my bicycle(soon), at least can reuse. When the car send for scrap, I want the car plate. haha.. den frame it up and collect dust.

Don't call me uncle!!

2005-09-20T04:25:00.000-07:00

Do I look old to u? How come so many ppl call me uncle?! I'm just a young, small, innocent, cute young boys.. :P I know my voice sound a bit.. er.. mature.. doesn't mean old!

I met this old lady while climbing the stair when she stop me to ask for direction.
"Uncle, do you know of..."

TIAN AR!!! WHY LIKE TAT!!! The worst part is this is not the first time but alot of time liao! I just did not shave much.. look at bit rounder.. wear abit orbian.. doesn't mean I'm uncle! Look like I've to do something about it. Maybe gonna have extreme make over soon.. change my image to reserve this situation.

Next time if anyone of you saw me dun call me uncle again le hor.. or somebody gonna get a hurt real bad.. somebody.. I'm not telling who.. hehe.. :)

Life of sick person

2005-09-13T04:41:00.000-07:00

I think this sem, the ppl that benefit most is not those who got A or dist but those who learn how to learn. There are a few ppl which I starting to respect them. Two of them are Kelly n Shawn. Let's start with shawn. Last week, he gave my a shock. He called kelly that he's worry about his exams and he's then studying at library. What?! Shawn went library to study?! Yes, he is. But there is another lady, think frm design sch, sitting opposite him. (When I first look at the lady, I know why shawn wants to go library liao.. haha..) Anyway, He asked me what to study! Isn't it amazing? He cares for his result. Finally! Though he shd worry 2 years ago, he still not too late to reget for life.

Then another person, Kelly, her database quiz result is better than mine. Even though I still don't believe she do by her own, she at least put in her efforts to study. She is too starting to worry about her result. U look, if they want to study they can.. Unlike someone else whom only rely on their friends to complete their work and act proud infront and tell other that his work is not enough or easy. WTF! Hope he will get enlighten someday.

Oh ya.. another one who blow n blow n blow.. dunno what to say about him. Another words, talk only. And the thing is, those who just met him think he's very capable. I've recently think of one analogy. Here it goes.

During the first wk of sch when we first discuss about the proj.
Blower: "I want to do this.. that.. we will be the best grp to complete..."
Analogy: He has plan to dig his grave.

After 4 wks n going to present our PICE idea to teacher.
Blower: "We will do this.. that.. den we will be the best grp to complete..."
Analogy: He has confirmed n decided he wants to dig his grave.

During the next few wks, he did not appeared or do anything meaningful in lesson.
Analogy: He is monitoring his grave is progessing well under schedule.

After 10wks has has past which we are gonna our partly completed proj present to teacher,
Blower: "We are going to do this but we do not have the resource or... "
Analogy: He has announced to the teacher that his grave is half digged (dunno got this spelling anot)

Eventually, final presentation comes..
Blower:"We are actually doing this but.."
Analogy: His grave is completed and he's ready to move in.

Well, I can't find anyway more well to express this kind of feeling. Sad as it is.. haiz.. He still owns ppl money and show no interest in returning back. More than a year and send tons of SMS and spent hours of phone call to him but still haf money still could not get back all. Should I still call this person fren?

temporally out of job

2005-08-26T06:34:00.000-07:00

bad timing.. I'm so happy that my ex- supervisor called me for work. The workplace has a vacancy. I'm quite delighted to go back after more than 2 years. But today diseaster struck, the company only offered 2 months contact which required u to work Immediately for 6 days per week. I don't mind except this period is my exam. If I work 6 days out of 7 days per week, most properly I can work for another 6 more months(repeat). Haiz.. but look to the bright side, since I've wait for 2 years, what is more waiting for another few more months.

Whole of today I'm busy with orienteering. However, I make a few mistakes. Being the most senior person there, making such mistake is very "xian shuai"(embrassing). I forgot to mark out the check point on the map! Lucky only dispatch 2 cadets. The incident only relieve when first cadet return to ask for check point. But strangely the second cadet did not notice anything wrong and actually took sometime for spec to find him - How he find the check point when it is not even marked on the map. My guess is he run around bindly the whole park. (poor thing.. ps.. ) This event, we invited sharifah. She is a quite cute and compact(short), it actually cause a stir among the cadets. I guess they are deprive of such thing in our uniform group. Come to think about it, quite true I also agree. Hehe.. :P

After thatI make a very big "Wu Long". I leave my car keys inside the car at sembawang park! I thought I would take a scroll near the beach and decide to leave my bag inside. I take out a key and after my scrolling, I found out I've taken a wrong Key. Why in the world this has to happen to me??? So what did I do, I walked 45 mins to my father's workplace, sembawang shipyard and another 30+ mins back to the park... ... ... But look to the bright side, keep fit! :)

Early this afternoon in school , I've been said to have a breast?! And it's bigger than jiaxian's one(not her real name to protect her idenity.. hehe..). She is telling her fren my one is more shaper. Jiaxian said she has B cup and it makes me to have at least a C, except my one can move up and down only. Dun worry la, as hong said surgery is getting cheaper, go try try. Maybe the result will be wonder. Haha.. :-P

wtf

2005-08-20T06:12:00.000-07:00

received birthday reminder in hotmail and i decided to send card to the birthday boy. So i went to yahoo, select naughty and click the one animated card. Then it goes..

"Aarr.. arr... yes... yes..." <= You know la(That faithful stormy night..)

Wtf.. my speaker is on and my parent outside watching TV. Lucky I smart, i ask them to take a look.. and they did not find it offender. Phew.. lucky me..

Suxy..

2005-08-19T19:58:00.000-07:00

Haiz..com skill again.. i think i lack on how to communicate much. And the interviewer ask the qns so diffcult and I've no idea how to reply. If they can interview wif mandrain, it shd not be hard.. well maybe.. but somehow this session has tell me that being able to talk well is important. yup.. so much so for my com skill.. haiz..

Also, I've some lame ans for yesterday.
Q: Where do you see yourself in 5 years?
A: I see myself sitting in your chair asking other ppl this qns.

Q: What will be my route of advancement during this 5 years?
A: During the 1st year, you will be as coffee boy, serving the colleague. After 2nd year, you will be promoted, as a senior coffee boy. After 3rd year, you will be serving coffee to manager level and above. Eventually after 5years, you will be fired!

During the interviewer session, hong, shawn, ziwei and me are joking around. We make crazy comment or reply. It's fun actually.. hehe..

Left 4 wks b4 my term ends. This mean I'll have 4wks b4 I will get out of academic stage of NYP. If I were to study again, it will be in another insitution. haiz.. In fact I'm enjoying myself the most this sem. Can talk cock sing song play mahjong.

Come to think abt it, we will even enjoy life during IPP or FYPJ. It's more enjoyable. Yeah! Looking forward to it. But I want to stay with my frens. I think most of them r going to FYPJ first. I think I'll request Ms chang to put me in FYPJ first. hehe..

Chong ar..

2005-08-02T05:08:00.000-07:00

Recalled one of the happy day is go on ride to Farrer park with zhiwei n the gang. Thanks to zhiwei so tat we can hop onto his car n tour s'pore. Also I've finally have a taste of driving auto car.. haha.. tat car compared to my parent's is heaven and earth. One vehicle got power steering and dun haf.. imagine the amount of force needed to steer the wheel.. eerrkk...

Anyway today went wif zhiwei again to borrow car again. Huh.. he complained tat it's not powerful enough even though it may seem to be powerful. I guess he should rent an evo9 if possible. Anyway my parent vehical is going to scap this Dec. Got drive no drive no longer matters to me.. hehe..As long as you are happy.. Cheers! :)

Growing Older..

2005-07-28T00:53:00.003-07:00

I have always thought that one getting older would mean getting more understanding. But that's not true for some cases. I felt that my sis is even more "childisher" than me. She is 2years older than me.
-------------------------------------------------
My sis always complain "zhong nan qiang nu(female)" that mean male being more important than female (meaning shd be like this). Whenever she quarrels, she will use this. Well, can u tell me what else does u want?
You have a own room since young. I've to share with my brother. You have a new piano, which costs more than 3K. My parent pays your computer while I have to work during holiday so that I have enough money to get this one. You have 2 wardrobes that hold ur clothes. One is being thrown away because u complain that it contain ants. My parent's concern has been devoted to you since young. They are always there when u needed help. If you want proof, ask urself, who buy u breakfast, who take care of you??

You look.. all the materialistic u have, all the care and concern you have. What else you can complain?

You quarreled that you did not go overseas where I went for Youth Expedition Project in Thailand. You making a fuss because you see me going overseas and you want to go Hong Kong. You think I fucking having tour over there ar. I go there to build pig sty, live in rural village that is out of contact with the world. You lei.. U go HK for what? You quarrel a few days. Ok, your wish is granted, you go for tour in Hong Kong to your BF's grandma house. Because you are alone, my mother takes leave and accompanies you. When you down there, who pay for you shopping?? You still dare say "zhong nan qiang nu".

Ok.. Nvm.. after u return, you break with ur BF. who is there for u? Who are the one who take care of you? Who comfort u when u're down? Do you know we have been even more concerning about you during that period. What else you want? You quarrel every now and then, and evertime u quarrel, u will say "zhong nan qiang nu", shout and scream.. oh ya.. everytime u scream u are always near the window.. screaming "zhong nan qiang nu". When i recall back, haha.. I gave a laugh..

These are a FEW of those thing u do. Nvm those how u have been telling the cousin how YOU think we've treating you. We have been "questioned" by our cousin for mistreating you. I guess this is what you dun know..

I'm getting SICK and TIRED in writing further. If you still have some conscious, please reflect upon your action. Please please.. we're a family, Not your punching bag. I've been tormented by you and your action for a long time. Sometime I think home is a unhappy place. Please have some human sense before you pick up another quarrel. Please grow up and be enlightened. That's some of the thing I wanna say.
-------------------------------------------------

haiz.. after expressing what I want to said. Yup... I am feeling better. Or else I think life is a miserly. Ok.. I think for those of you that read till here will be bored.. haha.. Ok.. Take care!

Sir, the coast is clear..

2005-07-26T11:08:00.000-07:00

Finally after a few days of "aerial bombing" there's a sign that tension is relieve over the 2 gals.. Fen and Kah xian.. Yup.. There will be crashes.. It's how u handle it tat makes the difference. I remember what my DC said: whenever u form a grp, there will be forming, storming, norming and performing. Yup.. right now we're in the storming stage, after the break hopefully we can proceed to norming stage.

( ok ok.. enough of my reflection.. haha..)

I remember last sem I've a similar situation where our sem proj is going at nothing.. A lot of crashes and last min rush btw each other. Tat time I blog my angry and frustation regarding my member but did not write the names involved. So what happen, Kelly who is in my grp read it. I still remember tat time she and me are sitting in the same row. U shd see how surpise and shock she was while reading. haha.. But at the end of the day, we're still friend.

Well, I'm gald this time fen n kah jian has taken it maturely. Use this break to calm down and reflect on what's to be improve..look, there will be sunshine after rain,rite? Yup..

(damm.. do i sound very naggy??)

A New Beginning

2005-07-22T06:50:00.000-07:00

Haha.. today has been good for me.. first, my presentation is finally OvER!! wah.. feel so relax now.. these few days is damm to tiring, do assignment till 4 or 5am.. den still need to attend lesson in the morning. jialat.. today must get a good sleep..

Exam exam..

2005-04-07T06:44:00.000-07:00

Exam is going on.. completed the second paper.. HCI.. the paper is relatively easy and this is where the problem arises.. When the paper is easy, there's bound to be moderation.. and when there 's moderation, a small margins of mark will make a huge difference.. ok la.. tolk abt something relax.. gonna tell a story

Anyway tolk abt yesterday, I'm in the exam hall, waiting for everyone to get to their seat.. Den i realise something.. a cockroach was crawling towards a girl frm Grp 11.. At that time, i'm thinking.. oh man.. what will happen if the girl scream in the middle of the exam hall.. it's going to be terrible.. but i continue watchting.. wating for it to happen..
"oh no.. nnooo.... " I said silently..
then...
SPASH!!
Ohhh?!! Someone(kelvin) walked pass it.. worst, he only step lower half of the body.. poor thing, the cockroach is struggling.. crawling towards to safetly.. crawl crawl.. the cockroach is telling himself, as long as i've one breathe, i will carry on.. not to mention, he still have a family to look after..

Then come the faithful moment of rememberence.. a moment of impact.. a day to remember.. a headache to our floor cleaner..

SPASH!!

Another person(zhiwei) step over it..This time, it's complete.. The whole body was flatten..

At the end of the exam, The cockroach was totally and i mean totally disintegrate and scattered along the passage way... organ and juices spread all over..

So our dear cockroach ended its story just on our start of exam.. A tribute to our cockroach who bravely cross over the hall! First known cockroach to have tried it and first to have such horror death.. Good Luck and hope u will learn to look left, look right, look left again in ur next life.. or is there going to be one.. hehe..

hahahaha..

2005-04-02T01:49:00.000-08:00

Went to driving lesson after stopping for more than 3 months... haha.. At least still know how to drive.. It was raining the whole day.. There was pool of water everywhere.. I knew I must slow down and I did.. But not that fast..I drove over the the pool of water and the water spash to the pedestrian .. Spash~~~ "tons" of water head towards the passer-by pedestrain..

(Recall the scene again.. Spash~~ ... and again.. Spash~~! )

When i look back at the rear mirror.. she was shock with both her hand up and looking at my car..can't imagine how drain she was.. Opps.. i didn't mean to.. but the sound "Spash~~" really make me.. hahaha... very bad..

Well.. I've been through once b4.. Sorry it has to be ur turn now.. Nxt time i'll slow down.. ... ...
Hopefully.. hahahahah... Spash~~

Conclusion.. Reflection For Better Tommorrow..

2005-03-31T21:58:00.000-08:00

I dunno how to describe.. if say too directly, it may hurt ppl, if i dun say, I may get mad.. Some ppl are too childish or ignorant to think of the consequence..
Meeting u say dun want..
if got meeting u want to hurry up and wanted to go away..
Have no intitvate to find out your prob on your own..

Den near the end of the presentation, you tell me you are afriad to present on tt day. You ask me to give you more work. I give you the workscope which half of it is done by me. u ask me whether the whole workscope belongs to you. In fact most of your work is done by me or other.

You ask me whether u have done enough.. i did not reply.. den u say "actually i've done alot lor.." If you have done alot, den what the hell is the amt i've done.. step by step i've given u..in fact, if i do it myself, it would be faster..

I can confidently tell u i've done what i haf.. dun everytime come up to me to say i nv gif u this or tat, nv tell u do this do tat.. it is not tt i nv tell u anything, go find out on ur own, if i haf given this amt of information to other, they would haf complete the job to me. Also For Goodness Sake, i'm your leader, not ur father..get tt straight! I can be a irresponible leader but i did not. U ought to be thankful. I did something which i nv done in my life.. step by step for u..not to mention this is for someone who is studying the same course and same year with me... Where's the hell is ur responability...

second person, cannot find u.. international women of mystery.. hard to find u.. during lesson, you were not there.. got HP cannot get through, u say ur hp is spoil not in use.. sometime call ur house no, u were not there be it any reason.. i know i gif u last min instruction, beside the fact i hardly find u, i hope u can understand my diffculity, especially this grp.. nv have i been so upset b4 in poly life. I know u can have done ur job; tt's why when we were rushing the prototype, i did not ask u to help me even though it may be our grp work. U juz do ur thing while we were rushing and come out with the best.. By doing this, i hope i can "pay up" whatever i've done not enough.

One thing u said make me reflect abt myself very much.. till now i kept thinking abt it.. u said " You are not decisive" Ya.. I admit I am. I've always thought i'm suppose to be the best. Goes through leadership courses... ; I've told myself many times i want to change , tired many methods juz to correct it. But what u say maybe rite, maybe i've fail..

But u can't juz walk out of the room when our grp is facing a crisis of not able to present the whole proj the nxt morning. I saw u talking ur bag and leave. At that time, i thought, you haf thousands of reason to leave, i dun expect u to stay. I know nothing can retain u anymore.. i wanted to say, I'm sorry. I'm not fit to be your leader, go find other leader and hope u can work u all the best.

I told someone my grp consist of 3.5persons instead of 5. But She said only 2 person. As much as i want to agree with her, it's also my reasonability not able to get those 3 ppl started work. But nevertheless, I wish to thank them for their accompany throughtout this sememster. It make me reflect abt me.. Hopefully this sememster project, both party can learn frm it and nxt time if we manage to do project again, we will know each other and hopfully by that day comes, we will be to work towards a better future...Good luck!

No use talking now..

2005-03-20T07:27:00.000-08:00

deleted the last post due to audience request.. hahaha... It's hard being a true leader.. I can be like bahamut zero if i want to.. dun care about the well being, prob tt his member faced.. but what's good of being a leader without doing what he's suppose to do...

select case
case 1: your grp got some problematic ppl and you're the leader
you're stress!
case 2: your grp leader is a heck care type,
you're in deep shit
case 3: your grp leader is a heck care type and your grp got problemactic ppl,
you're in deeper shit..
end select

many things i've not said.. especially a grp like this.. frm the surface i'm like to be blamed for all.. but in fact, even though could haf done much better, i've try to work out. I'm so stress tat whenever i do my proj, i wonder what will happen nxt.. no use being personal at this stage.. thing dun get moving..

hope that they will still follow what i say, though they have the rights to rebel over it.. Shit don't juz go away.. you have to find a way to clear it and take care of it so tat it will not happen again in the future..

"ShIt iS HiTtinG ThE FaN" - BrE 10 March 05

2005-03-11T08:07:00.000-08:00

~~Yeah Man.. the shit is hitting the fan.. And what happen after that? The shit spread out.. and shit came falling our head.. this is what i can conclude for this week chaos shedule..~~

~~Monday:~~

Worry about imagine Cup thing, group member compulsoary must have 4members, our's only 3. Ask any guy to sign upbut did not receive confirmation email. Ask exsisting member to think of any idea but did not come with any relating to our theme. pull hair vomit blood, rushing up and down just to think of something. Finally got idea and hand in 15mins behind deadline.

Tue:

received email stating the there is extension of deadline! Bloody hell, worst is receive confirmation letter that they received my proposal.. any changes is too late...!!!
following day have presentation of prototype.. watch the presentation by another grp and follow their way of doing prototype.
The following day also have Enterprise Quiz which is 35%. At night, spent 4hrs doing the UI for the prototype which all some of member did not do or do like dun do also the same like tat..Finally, Manage to get it almost done and send to breton for UI design.
did not study much for exam the nxt day.. do till midnight for prototype
wed:
early morning still need to meet grp member for last touch up on prototype. Worst, after all the hard work on coding, our tutor say "No!"; did not meet requirement and do not want to view it at first.. tat mean Zero straight away.. WhAT??!! we work so hard and u din even view and say we cannot get even one percent!! What the hell, what about the another group which we saw the day b4, they are announced the best prototype and here we did not even get to present! WTF is tat.. Where's the fairness..
afternoon got another shit.. exam and did not know much.. tried my best to do it but still too much remain undone.. WhO can i blame.. Me..
Thurs:
she bark me again for UI.. she say cannot finish dun blame her cos she dun haf the UI.. sheDIdn't i send her very long time ago.. . though it is not the latest one.. i remember asking her to get from bre one more time.. even if she dun haf she can do a blank page with all the field there.. it's juz the code tat's works tt matter.. When i'm going home, i thought i cou;d get some peace, but she called and say she did not haf the UI, the rating is not there............. ............. All the qns she said make no sense to me, if no web reference den add urself la.. what u add reference is teacher one all kind of shit.. you are supposed to do on fresh proj and somemore the "add reference" we learn on pract 1 of 2203.. dun tell me u dun how to do it.. even if so cannto flip book to recall issit,, muz tell me you dun know how to do it ar.. den when i ask u what kind of error is it can u tell me what is the error.. cos if u dun tell me how am i going to solve the thing for u.. dun say u dun know the error cos if u dun know, how u expect me to know, correct anot... Anyway, so stress answering her phone, i dunno the ans cos the UI is bre do one and u complaint me this and tat, how am i going to help u........ the only thing u say is dun haf, den how ar.. how am i going to tell u how.. dun tell me u dun know how to help urself ar.. not complainting to me how to do.. so STRESS!!!!!!!!!!!!! Den where is the another grp member? No where to be found.. Call, msg also no reply... At night msg bre, he said he had told her many time to do on a proxy page..UI has already been sent to her.. she has been complainting to me our grp got prob, everything is so mess up.. tell u in ur face, one of the prob is u.. can u stop complainting everytime when u do proj, meet with error dun make it like every one error, try to find the soln for urself, I do it, everyone also do it, so why u can't be like any other normal person??!! Why muz so depend on other, he is not coding partly because of u.. CAN U WAKE UP AND STOP BE SO ANNOYING ANOT? Do i need to give u one tight slap b4 u know what u are driving us into anot..
shit is still there.. but study for Quiz the following day till 2 mid-night
fri:
shit happen.. our grp did not haf much to present to teacher.. our grp can compare to wenjun.. same like or even worst.. But this will be the last time it will happen again.. Sun will be seen again after rainfall..
held one emercency meeting, and finally there is one meeting since so many wks.. discuss so many idea.. i tell my member, "If anything Update me(not complaint or nag), cos i dun know of any shit, he dun know any shit, we juz throw shit at each other.."
I'm suspecting my role as a leader.. i cannot lead or they could not listen.. how come it turn out to be like this.. as future leader, i cannot even control a few person, how can i manage a platoon.. Very low morole.. how can it happen.. Why??!!! I told them, i stay up ard 1am worrying why our grp become like this.. what can i slove it.. I thought of this idea of reporting to me the status of proj every end of the day.. but they can't think for themselves meh.. They are adult now.. i treat them as one, dun tell me they still need someone to look over them, they shd be able to think for themselves.. Though there may be statement like no bad member, only bad leader.. By any "luck" if we were to get a bad grade, i want the blame to be blame on urself as well.. i dun want to stay up in the middle of the night worrying our proj while u being pressive and naunasie and giving us headache. Whenever i wan to haf meeting can u all be more supportive, all juz wanted to rush home especially u.. i've not said what i want to say and u are packing ur bag standing us tell us to stop and go home. What the hell... I dun ask for all of you to be supportive, at least do appear at lesson so tat i can find u.. I've a hard time finding u all, most of the lesson did not attend, once sch over could not find u..when i called u sometime did not reply, worst, telling me u dun haf this dun know that, find ur f***** own material la.. i still need to serivce u ar..

wah.. nv wonder i could be so offensive.. feel even better if i can tell them in their face.. but time like this i dun care liao la..i feel even angry when i could not get thing done.. yeah.. that;s me.. i know muz change... but let me voice our first.. ihaha.. shit is falling...

Thing has to happen..

2005-02-26T08:22:00.000-08:00

It's a miserable day for me knowing what your fren, or should I call them fren, did to you. When I meet my classmate to pass them a disc, I saw my fellow platoon mates which we have went through for 6years, coming up the escalator. They did see me cos I saw them see me but they pretend they did not see me and with their look on their face, they turn away.

I was wondering what was with their uniform until I found out that they went shooting laser simulator with my cadets. No one told me anything. I was deliberately left in the dark. One cadet asked me why I didn’t go; I never answer him, I don’t know how.

All my platoon mates were went through training with me since Sec1. One of them was even one of my better friends. All of them did not inform me about the event. Even the cadet who was supposed to update me of any event did not pass me any info; they want to leave me out…

This is not the first example. There were many others more. I had conflict with them. But I do that for a reason. Maybe some actions were wrong… Nevertheless, I still regard them as a friend. I know we can’t communicate, I’ve purposely find some topics just to strike a conversation between them.

Come to think of it, I felt so miserable actually knowing my friends did this to me! It is like a spear sticking right through your heart. So pain, I felt like I could not breathe. Why it become like this? Am I so piss off? I've enough problem of my own which have not been solved, this is making it worst!

Maybe someone can give me the answer…

Trying to finding search the light of life…

~ Recount ~

2005-01-31T03:51:00.000-08:00

Today my bro's fish died! I realise this when I came home in evening. It's a 5 years old arowana. Plenty fortunate to live till this age. There's seemed to be something missing... remember the sound of filter used to fill the room now it's so quiet...

It remind me of one incident... actually is both... except it end up the same. It dates back when I'm Sec 3. One fine and normal day, one of my classmates did not attend class. At first we thought it was another absence case. But it did not turn out so. As we get later into the day, there were some rumor that he had pass away. At first I thought it was a wicked joke made by others. We go on the rest of the day like the original day.

I was taking a nap and was disturbed by numerous phone calls. But I carry on sleeping. I finally take the call, it was confirm, and he did not make it. For the whole day, I was blurred. I don't know what to do or what I should do.

Another incident happens in Sec4. After the recess time, I saw my friend being carried to the front of the General Office. My temporary classroom is directly opposite. I watched him being taken away into an ambulance. This was also the last time I saw him...

At home, I was sleeping and I finally take the call from my classmate. It was another one. I could not believe it. I found it too nuisance to be true, too disturbing... How could it happen again? Can it be stop? Why it happen on us? What have we done wrong..? And the next day is our O level science pract...

I could not explain this entire thing. For sometime, I have fear sleeping in the noon. I'm afraid I was to be awake by call telling another of my friend has gone. Luckily, it did not happen. It has changed me much then...

Since then, I've been wondering why is life. Why are we living in the world...? Till now I could really found out the answer. or is there really an answer... who knows...

From the incident, it has made me grown up. That's why I do thing different from other. Like I’ve always, I don't want to do say I've not done this or that thing when at the edge of dying. The day can never be the same again.

well.. only the time can heal and tell the truth..

May everyone find the meaning in their life and not one day live to reget it..

Is Money the Way?

2005-01-29T17:56:00.000-08:00

Something to think about..

Yesterday I've attended a rally, or so they call it a rally. With a batch of "same-minded" peoples going to attend bonus presentation of one of the MLM company. At first I've no idea what's the event was going to be like till i'm in the climate. The Chairman awarded a $131 000 cheque to a couple, it's only bonus exclude the regular sum of money they got every month.

Huh.. the whole event left me wondering alot of thing. What is life? Do we live cos of money? Our aim at life is it only Money? Can money really buy u all the stuff u want?

At the whole event, whole batch of people were talking about money $$$. Strategy and plan to earn money. The incentives they gave out, i admit was plenty, so much so that I don't think that person would have enough time left to spent.

Day in Day out, hours in hours out, I kept hearing them talking about Money..

Life shd not be solely making money. Something we could be too involved in making money that we were "blinded" by the money.

I would rather find out more about life.. or at least what is life or why are we living all about. The YEP trip has make me think about my whole life again. villgers working in the padi field whole day, 365days a year and in the end only have enough money to feed their family still find themselves happy.

The thing is not about being poor. It's about being Happy, being able to find happiness in our life. Why sacrifice ur life over money? I do not to die saying I've not accomplish alot of thing in my life. I want to do what i've interest in. Money is secondary though it is necessary.

Huh.. am I different or I've my own stand.. Nonetheless, like what Bon Jovi once sang..
It's my life..

~Something seem to be missing.. what is it..~

Something Missing?

2005-01-29T17:06:00.000-08:00

huh.. today i woke up, i felt something missing.
Wonder what is it?

Maybe is fun time with the cadets. Such a long time i've not been for camp feast.. going for NDP training and Dec at the YEP trip itself. Nevertheless, I still "manage" to do what I shd do. Haha.. though giving most problem in Foxtrot Company like the attendance which S1 shd have given me the updated nominal roll on the second day. well... Sorry to my OC,Sharifah, who has done a good job!

Also I've been slience mostly for the debriefing beside the fact I'm also tired.. hehe.. but one thing i muz carify.. I did not qurrel in front of the cadets, I only argue on the point tat if my APC was taken, who's going to take care of the cadets? Every post had its responsibility. If I'm away, what would happen to the cadets? luckily, on that day the distance of the 2 location is near, OC is around. Wonder what could have happen if the day was mostly on the move. Actually, I only aruge "enough" to express my pt of view. IT is not Quarreling!!!

well, the cadets are cute. They remind me of my cousin. haha.. Those lovely cutie boys and gals spice up my life.. at least for 2days. But good thing have to end. Well, if i have the time den i hope to see these cadets next time. Juz remember my name.. Hahaha.. ;)

Haiz..

2004-09-02T20:29:00.000-07:00

Haiz.. Yesterday was my most humiliating situation I ever encounterd during my years as CLT. I've been thinking that by not objecting and defending the authority is doing, I have show respect and thoughtfulness. The "thoughtfulness" has bought me nothing but disrepesct by peer and junior. Over the year, I've thought of guiding and leading as a example. Nonetheless, due to the changing training foucs in NSS, there is not much chance for me to even interact with the cadets. I could even count the number of training conducted so far.. give it 15. In additional, my peers has been questioning about the standard of my unit. Some even try to interfere into our own interal policy. Thought they may once from NSS, they have been posted to other schools. In some sense or another, they are physically not attached to NSS. Even if they want to implement something, at least they must inform their peer if they are dealing with the lower level; show some respect at least...
Sometimes, I've been worried by the situation. Maybe I've wrong concept myself. All these have make my self-doubt. Why Do I need to worry so much? What did I get, nothing but disrepesct and humiliate by others. Cadets playful, gang up and be try to be funny, doing all the backend stuff. I remember one of my senior have say, when u want to join CLT, don't expect anything. I don't expect anything. I could have do more with these time. I could have join Wushu or learn my taichi.. Engaged in many others thing. I'm sure there is alot I would learn from outside. But why I still hang on.. Even thought I know what I have done is useless, some of my credit other have taken also.. I seen myself having this respondability to undertake as a model even if it is not in favour. Once I've completed what I have started out will I say my mission is complete. Am I a different person.. I just want to be normal..
My metality have changed. The CLT is a stepping stone so that I can archieve higher standard of commanding. I've seen this as opportunity for me to improve.. being a CLT is diffcult..being a good CLT is even more diffcult...